Fyi I let myself into your place, I'm wearing some of your clothes in your bed. Come take them off
So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
i just found a cheeto on my floor and ate it. i might still be drunk.
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
Well I never thought in the future I'd be able to say "hey remember that Easter I made porn?"
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
Randomize
