I am engaged
To a real live girl that has met me
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
I was in a house full of lesbians and they were all staring at me. I felt like the last cresent roll on Thanksgiving.
hungover at the ER to get half my contact removed from behind my eye. Not the start to the weekend I was hopin for
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
I passed out in all my clothes. like my purse too..and with a cup of water next to me..and my last tweet last night was "Bye."
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
I recall trading my iPhone watch for a carton of Marlboros.
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
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