idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
Sorry I didn't answer your call last night, I was peeing on the driveway.
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
I'm taking a pole dancing class this morning. Can I put you down as my emergency contact? I'm NOT putting my mother
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
Randomize
