i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
i told him to take shots to cure a hangover and he told me i was "walking the steppingstones to alcoholism"
Your drunken mistake is coming over to see if she wants to buy any of our furniture. I know youre desperate, but try not to fuck her, without a condom, for a fourth time, while shes there.
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
I think when Jesus turned water into wine it was a sign that we should get drunk off Sangria tonight. Do it for Jesus. He died for your sins.
I'M GOING TO FUCK AN ENTIRE ORCHESTRA AND NOTHING CAN STOP ME
The band club does not count as an orchestra
I got pull-out-my-nuvaring-drunk last night.
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
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