WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
phone sex would be way better if there was an app for that...
i just snorted my name. best moment ever
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
The worst mistakes make the best memories. Write that down.
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
Reasons I shouldn't drink... My twitter drafts keep getting more and more emotional.
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
Yesterday I went home with one shoe, today I go home with three. Fucking win.
my roommate had drunk sex above me in our bunk bed and then built me a fort to apologize the next day
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
Randomize
