Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
Have you come up with a team name for the beer pong tournament on Saturday?
We can be the stepdads. If anyone asks why say because we beat you and you hate us.
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
My mom just called and reminded me not to throw up in any cabs tonight. Happy St. Patty's Day.
One of my students just said I have "big mommy parts". Even third graders know that my tits are too big. God I love em.
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
We ended up debating which Food Network host would do best in porn.
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
Randomize
