we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
I've come to realize sober is a rare time of the day.
I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.
Just re-gained consciousness in the freshman girls dorm. Normally this would be awesome but I'm on the floor surrounded by chicks doing their homework. This makes me uncomfortable but I don't think they know I'm awake yet. If I b-line for the door can you come get me?
I just found a casserole dish in my oven filled with broken glass, blood, and chopsticks. And the REALLY fucked up thing is that finding it answered more questions than it raised.
Want to FaceTime and watch me finish this bagel?
Halfway through the night I was hiding in a trashcan. Then I "sobered" up and ran around the house throwing change because I wanted to make my last moments of 2013 charitable.
The moment when you and your BFF compare frequently used emojis and realize you have similar mental disorders and a really weak alibi.
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
Randomize