Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
He somehow managed to accomplish karate kicking a door down, cockblocking my friend in the room, and writing "tits" all over the house with a blue sharpie.
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
Can you please reassure him im not a scary or intimidating person? And that really my entire life is a series of completely ridiculous events that have led me here?
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.
I think you're overestimating how drunk I was
You said your pillow felt like the ocean...
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
Randomize
