I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
thank god my boss can't smell the tequila on my breathe over the phone.
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
You can't just send the picture of my vagina back to me, 2 months after we broke up, and make small talk out of it.
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
Randomize
