Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
I never actually go in the club. I get in line, hit on a chick, and convince her to come drink all she wants for free at my house.
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
the gnome is staring at me and the pineapple is wearing shorts. I don't want to do this anymore.
I'm too picky for internet dating and by picky I mean psycho.
Randomize
