We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
he had to chose between the booze and condoms
what did he choose?
the booze, then looked at me and said, plan b is free right?
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
I came over to his house for a party and realized I was quoted on the fridge... "How'd I get rug burn on my face?" And yes, my name was right next to it!
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
You're a waste of cheezeits
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
Thank you for dog sitting, there is $60 on my desk to be spent on DRUGS AND/OR GAS ONLY not that food stuff people crave.
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
Apparent my drunk ass was so dedicated to taking a piss, when I walked across the dance floor to get to the bathroom a 9/10 broad tried to dance with me and I just pushed her aside, like hard enough to send her a few feet from where she was standing, pointed at her and said "Not now chief, gotta rock a mean one."
Randomize
