I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
When I woke up I had three missed calls from the name 'dream krystals'.... If I remember correctly she was the lady at the drive thru at Krystals and her name was Dream.. She wanted to come to the strip club with us... Do you remember?
dude you need a shock collar for some of the things you say when you're drunk.
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
It's blow job season.
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
Just got high and apologized to my vagina for getting chlamydia
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
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