wakey wakey hands off snakey
I can already tell this is gonna be one of those parties where we sit across the room and text about people.
How come it tastes like onions whenever I go down on her?
he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
Waking up to find your mom holding your birth control pills and telling you I suggest you take this
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
Randomize