why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
I had to warn the neighbors
Warn them about what?! It's noon
"Pay no attention to me if at random points of the day I'm outside with kitty cat ears on" I'm a mess...
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
life lesson #151: dont let people go batshit crazy and stab you in the knee
i will live by this rule
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
I just wrote the Drag Queen from Saturday Night on FB and apologized for licking her. Weirdest thing I have ever typed...
I described my life as a 7 layer cake of death
The guy I blew who bought us all the shots last night? I really think he's the TV guy I'm watching give the local weather. Like right now.
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
