we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
I've carried my liver for over 24 years. If it can't carry me for the next 24 hours than it deserves to be damaged.
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
OMG. Hung over at my grandparents house. Threw up on 3 T-stops, countless snowbanks, and the grandparents driveway. Was proposed to last night. Bruised from head to toe from falling down 3 flights of stairs. Debating my intelligence because it seems that "happy new years" is too hard for me to spell. How were your new years festivities?
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
I'm only texting you this bc god forbid circumstances change when you wake up but currently santa is asleep on top of the washer and dryer.
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
The cat's telling me to stop taking acid, and to start doing the lords work. I'm almost 99% sure he's talking about the dark lord.
THIS CAT'S GOING TO TURN INTO A SNAKE AND KILL ME! GET OVER HERE NOW! BRING YOUR WAND.
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
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