His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
Went to anytime fitness at 3:34 am drunk after the the bar and getting whataburger. Lifted weights with my cheeseburger between my knees. That's called DEDICATION.
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
I didn't tell that thing I wasn't coming over. Whoops
You know you haven't dated in a while when you call boys "that thing" and call dates "a boy type thing."
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
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