After I made out with her she fell asleep and started pooting in her sleep. Are we sure lesbians are hot? Cause that wasn't.
why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
I just puked in the mop bucket at work. I think I need to go home.
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
Ps we ordered a pizza at the pool today and I dropped the entire thing in the pool. We still ate it. #canthang
I made him fuck me with my coat zipped up and a unicorn mask on. That level of drunk sex. Weird and creepy yet highly satisfying.
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
First you stole a hockey stick out of the nieghbors yard and claimed you were moses leading his children home. Then you led us around the same block twice before I called the cab
Randomize
