Tell me I did not drive one hour for whiskey dick.
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
Randomize
