He's like the fucking Houdini of bras. Not only did I not feel him take it off I didn't find it until two days later.
i went to a real vip club. the bathroom attendant was wiping down counters after girls wearing gucci did lines of coke on them. where did MY life go wrong
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
Unless you can blow me and bake me a pie at the same time, im not impressed.
You don't know the true meaning of fear until your girlfriend's niece insists on sitting on your lap with 20 mg of Viagra coursing through your veins.
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
how do you tell someone, in the most complimentary way possible, that they would make an excellent stripper?
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
Randomize
