The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
Walking down the street at 11 pm dressed in bubble wrap. Why is the bar so fucking far away??
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
she asked him to cuddle cuz she was cold and instead he got up, moved the space heater to her side of the bed, and went back to sleep
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
Not gonna make it. My ovaries are playing laser tag
I'm in too deep with Breaking Bad. I realized I've altered my Tinder likes to people that either look like Jesse or work in a school's Science department.
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
he was like tryna hang and chat and I was like dude there's an iguana in this room
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
sober me is not impressed with the quality of people that drunk me gives our phone number to
Randomize
