I think i ate a live goldfish last night. that i caught with my hand in a kiddie pool. my stomach really hurts.
i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
I'm going to shower the piss off me now. I feel like I was in an R. Kelly dream.
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
My dating life has become some fucked up hydra of dicks; you cut one off and two pop up in its place.
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
When you're high, you dance like an injured velociraptor.
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
Through a complicated series of events, I wound up in the desert with a blue chick from comic-con. we lost peter. if you're alive, please come get us.
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