Funny, my mom didn't get it when I said 'that's what she said' after she said 'it's so thick, it's impossible' in reference to my milkshake
Then we managed to set a grill and all 24lbs of meat on it on fire. I didn't help because I was filled with alcohol and extra flammable.
Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
He returned my car yesterday. Found a duffel bag with beef jerky, condoms, and a handgun this morning. Slightly concerned
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
You started singing Baby Shark, screamed you have no idea how it goes, then somehow turned the beat into Bohemian Rhapsody
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