shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
Why I am the classiest girl you know: just mixed drinks for everyone on the baby changing station at the movie theater.
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
history professor just told us he has magic fingers. i'm going for it.
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
How bad is the voicemail?
You graded my boobs.... C minus. Asshole.
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
My greatest achievement in life thus far is being the go to friend when you have questions about butt plugs.
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
Randomize
