she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
I like my landing strip. Makes me feel sophisticated.
What you did last night can never be called sophisticated. I don't care how you trim your pubes.
Stripper with the black hair and lip rings is still asleep. Found out she wasn't lying when she said she was a squirter, it was like splash mountain.
I'm doing an Uber ride of shame in a red, white and blue bikini top and America shorts. Good for me.
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
I have successfully trained your dog to bring me pudding cups!
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
Randomize
