people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
I just took a shit in a BP station. It seemed appropriate since they are shtting in our ocean.
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
He used my blackberry to make a voice recording of me orgasming, then set it as my ringtone while I was sleeping. I discovered this during a staff meeting this morning.
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
She asked if I wanted to "Mormon Motorboat" her, which I guess is just motor-boating her through her cloths. Turns out I did.
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
I just washed my birth control down with captain because I don't have any water and I need to wash the blood off my face before I leave my room.....
Remember when I said I had my shit together?
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
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