you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
You grabbed your house keys, threw them at the door and asked, "did it open?"
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
i'm pretty sure my brother is still drunk from last night. he's telling my parents that humans are at the top of the food chain for a reason and listing off all the exotic animals he would eat
He saw my Halloween/ Costume closet and assumed I’m into cosplay. I’m going with it. What’s sexier, a cop or a nurse?
Randomize
