Church boner. Awkwardddd
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
He came up to me muttering about the pills on the bathroom floor... I found him an hour and a half later trying to take naked photos of himself with an alarm clock...
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
turns out that the cat the james was trying to catch was a raccoon. call me when you get this, i need an ER buddy
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
I am one Jewel song away from suicide watch
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
The assignment was about the Industrial Revolution so I just screamed at them in a British accent all day. No, they didn't know I was hungover.
Mike's not allowed to drink vodka anymore. He couldn't get his temporary tattoos (stickers) to stick so he super glued them on.
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
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