we have officially lost it.
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
Just toasted a glass of brandy with my own reflection to my dimples. Why are you not here?
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
Since your rent is paid til the first, we decided to use your apartment as the beer pong room. We apologize in advance for losing your security deposit.
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
Randomize
