his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
I can't believe im sexting my roommate. This is really what my life has come to
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
A guy just grabbed my balls before he shook my hand because he thought he knew me.
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
Is it against health code to come into work half drunk and commando?
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
I’ve gotta be honest, I didn’t expect to have sex. I didn’t shave... anything. You couldn’t have been impressed.
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