i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore.
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
You handed me a red solo cup filled with vodka and Bacon. You called it the salty Russian.
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
I got dressed on his front steps, peed on his neighbors lawn, then did a shoeless walk of shame home at 5am...
The tequila covers up the fact that the choco liquor tastes like sadness.
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
Randomize
