Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
No, seriously, 1.5 gallons of sangria plus two days of untapped cock. Waiting here. For you.
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
If a hot cougar texts u and says "back massage, blow job".... you show the fuck up.
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
Its mothers day, andI woke up with 12 bar stamps on my face, holding orange juice and a box of tampons. This can not be happening
You think you're smart. You're pretending to be asleep to save yourself from my hormonal pms mood swings. Unfortunately that only works against bears.
I've replaced you with thin mints and masturbation
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
Randomize
