I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
He was really drunk and I dared him to jump the swimming pool on his bike. Sadly he couldn't. Hey did you know a testicle can burst?
i'm not sure when it happened but apparently now it's topless bar night, im wearing a leotard and everyone is looking at me like i'm cheating.
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
When nipples stop being hilarious I'll stop getting them out in public.
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
Randomize
