just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
our new exchange student wants to hear all about America's greatest politician, "Oprah." it's gonna be a long fucking day
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
He went out to smoke and when he came back I was still in the same spot naked and unable to breathe.
All I could say was, "ladies and gentlemen, THIS is why I drive 30 mins"
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
I've decided to become a librarian so I can drunkenly quote The Mummy and have it be legit.
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
Finding my pants in the morning should not make me this proud
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
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