we have pet lesbian snakes
Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
Found our threesome girl. She says I'm pretty. She doesn't know I'm pregnant. Yet. Think we can pull it off?
Is a wave an appropriate goodbye when your one night stand wakes up and walks out towards the door while you are looking through the garbage for the evidence of a condom?
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
Randomize
