that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
We're having soft pretzels and cheese dip for dinner tonight. Like fucking adults.
So far I've taken two naps, went out and bought a pizza called the Hipster, and in 15 min I'm gonna make a snow angel. Conquering Snowlandia. How bout you?
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
One of your 'guests' left her bra in the kitchen.
Dude, does it look like any of the women I bring home wear bras?
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
Dear Douchebag, I would just like to formally issue this fuck you. You will be receiving a letter in the mail soon. With all of your stuff.
Randomize
