We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
I really liked your hair last night but that style makes it really hard to hold it while you puke
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
you started crying about dinosaurs being extinct
that's why i woke up holding that dina girls hand
she's a dina-saur
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
Her birthday cake consisted of a shot of tequila with a candle in it
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
There is a drunk marine passed out on my porch. Mandy wouldn't sleep with him, Can you please come remove him?
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
Randomize
