So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
Tonight, a friend walked in and said "oh look at that. Drunk on the living room floor. Just as expected." this is my life. This is my life.
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
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