Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
I'm still pretty drunk right now, but when this hangover hits me, I'm going to be super pissed. It's a preemptive never drinking again.
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
At first I was a little embarrassed for sharting, but then i realized it was a bachelor party, and I went balls to the wall
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
Randomize
