So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
Is it wrong in Austin to talk to the homeless while I feed a bird my chips??
This must be what defeat feels like to Tom Brady today. I bet he wishes he could barf up all of his bad decisions from yesterday, too.
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
His arresting officer when they were busting up the squat party recognized him from the anti-drone protest. He was like Jesus kid, you were sober last time.
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
Oh and .... you'll love this: my life coach says you writing my online dating profile isn't a horrible idea.
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
Randomize
