Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
Apparently I was playing rock paper scissors against myself for 2 hours in the bathroom mirror.
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
He just said he was the Jesus of alcoholics.
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
I. Did. In fact. Sprain. My liver. This. Weekend.
I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
She texted me this morning asking why all of her house pillows were inside her mini-van.
So thats where i built my buckingham palace
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
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