That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
If you die first, I'm going to sleep with a pallbearer at your funeral.
I really hope you didn't eat the bowl of melted vanilla ice cream I left on the coffee table. Because it is not melted vanilla ice cream.
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
They've already turned me into the Dean of Students once because they felt 'unsafe' because I came home hammered and asked one of them to make me a grilled cheese sandwich. Like, I just ASKED!
Apparently I came into our room and told her that there should be a zipline from our window to Walgreens so that I could get chicken noodle soup
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
Randomize
