and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
Found my wallet. It was under my dresser with a note that said "good job you found me". Drunk me is an ass.
New low: falling asleep with my face in the toilet only to be awoken when my hand slid down and touched the water. It's moments like these I wish I could forget.
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
I just conducted a skype meeting drunk and in the middle of a cornfield. I don't even think they noticed.
Told her my spirit animal was the spread eagle. Now that's my name in her phone.
Wake up. Eat bread. Find your dignity. Don't be late for work again.
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
Randomize
