Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
You asked the dj to play 'who let the dogs out" because it was your birthday. You left the bar and then re-entered to the song
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
I woke up this morning and the search history on my phone says: "What is this castle in front of my house?"
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
I had to sit there with his three fat aunts talking about a bunch of 50 Shades knockoff books.
I felt like a taxi, but my meter was running up minutes he would be eating me out that night.
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
He held my hair back for me while i vomited in my driveway last night and i repayed him by farting mid-heave.
I can't believe I got dumped for a fat chick, but at least I got four and a half years worth of free shit. So we can call it even.
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
Randomize
