yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
They don't allow McDonald's in the ER. Go figure
I found a half composed text to you this morning and all it said was HELP M. Is that how I ended up at the bottom of the stairwell in only a tee-shirt and one heel?
considering I never received the text I would go with 'yes'.
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
Deciding whether to take my sex toys home for Christmas will be the biggest decision I make this holiday season
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
I'm eating ice cream out of my purse
Randomize
