How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
I'm sorry about your car but on a brighter note I did wake up in my dorm. That's something right?
Fuck you.
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.
Oh and I ate all of your Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Consider it part of your reparation payment for accidental anal insertion. I may continue to collect payments until I am no longer sore.
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
But I'll just tell people it was a bar fight... Sounds a lot better than "well I was drunk and alone and eating Special K naked in my bed"
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
Btw. I have a sinus infection from doing cocaine in a portapotty at a Duran Duran concert. So, gimme a couple of days before y'all start the party.
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
Randomize
