Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
My dinner was lean cuisine and tequila. Aaaaaand I need a boyfriend.
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
I left my panties in the microwave for too long and they caught on fire
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
Randomize
