I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
That's the best thing about having gay dads, you don't gotta do shit on mothers da and everybody is down wit getting wasted on mimosas at brunch
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
He says I vaguely mumbled happy New year, kissed him, threw up and then went back to sleep.
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
I just bought a butt plug on Amazon prime day and you're the only person I felt would appreciate that decision
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
I Projectile vomited a massive question mark on Brent's bedroom wall. Don't tell him it was me. I want him to play the whodunit game.
Randomize
