haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
How external is "for external use only"?
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
Maybe one day we'll get unicorn butt tattoos together
I'm putting my hangover kit in my car for the trip to work tomorrow morning. Dedication
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
You just kept mumbling about the carpet being covered in stains that looked like the face of God. Until you decided that they were closer in relation to Dumbledore.
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
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