no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
you were watching a documentary about sharks and wouldn't stop stroking my legs and whispering "what if they could walk?"
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
oh god I've lost the ability to distinguish between 'star trek' and 'the future'
He made the Waffle House lady get me out of the car. This isn't a joke.
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
Your girlfriend agreed to a threesome, I saw dogs in a bar. It seems life is falling into place for us
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
Randomize
