i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
I don't know what to be prouder of: the fact that last night i was able to successfully find my way home from evanston with 3-d glasses on, or that i was able to make my way around my house in the dark with my pants around my ankles
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
I'm literally in my bed still trying to find the energy to take my corset off so I can binge eat oreos
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
Ran up to the dollar store to get batteries for my vibrator. Happy Valentines Day!
How did I get the fat lip, while puking I may or may not have sneezed... Wacking my face into the toilet bowl...
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
Randomize
